"Please try your call again later."

[serinde]

The mental malaise that affected me at Arisia extended into last week & the weekend. (It is generally considered a Bad Thing when one has a spontaneous, inexplicable crying jag into the kitchen sink on a pleasant Saturday morning.) Some of it is probably continued exhaustion, some of it old accustomed agitas I've whinged about before, some of it anticipation of the consequences of over-committing my personal resources (OH GOD I'M EVEN TALKING LIKE A MANAGER SHOOT ME) and the related feeling of not being on top of things, like I'm bailing a hole in the sand that keeps refilling. This latter is, I realized, because I'm accustomed to having plenty of time at work to Figure Shit Out; organize time (both mine and everyone else's), triage what potential events can or can't happen, blah blah blah. I haven't had that for several weeks now and so I keep dropping packets, as it were. This increases my stress, so my organization gets worse, and behold! a vicious cycle.

Saturday was Call of Cthulhu, and Sunday was a whole bunch of lazing around (and some cooking). I felt somewhat guilty for not getting all the stuff done that wanted doing, but I feel a lot better about the universe today, so maybe it was a reasonable tradeoff. I still owe lots of people email, and we have a Bataan Death March of Sewing this weekend (once again, volunteerism is its own punishment!), and I have a long to-do list, but things don't seem as insurmountable. Long may it wave--ask me again Thursday, I guess.