fuckin' Noo Joisey

[serinde]

To whom it may concern:

Enclosed please find my check for payment of $54 for my jaywalking ticket (which ticket is also enclosed). I do, however, categorically refuse to pay the $10 additional fine imposed by the "failure to appear" notice. The reason for my refusal is that this fine appears to be contingent on failure to appear at a court date, listed as November 15th, which I was not notified of. You will see that there is no court date listed on the ticket; and when I saw this upon receipt of the ticket & phoned the Court to ask when my court date was, so that I knew the date by which I needed to pay, I was told that no court date was assigned. And considering I have had the actual ticket in my possession for less than two weeks, this additional fine is both outrageous and utterly unreasonable. (I could say the same about ranking jaywalking an equal offense to driving an unregistered vehicle, but the law is the law, and this is not the place to dispute the matter, I know.)

I hope this resolves the matter. If there is anything further required of me, please contact me at XXX-YYY-ZZZZ.

Sincerely,

me.

Comments

[arkham1010.livejournal.com]

Yah, you go.

Fuck da man, yo

[dariodevil.livejournal.com]

Wait a minute... that's not your phone number! Those are letters!!

[syringavulgaris.livejournal.com]

ENCRYPTED FOR SECURITY!!1!~

[dariodevil.livejournal.com]

All this time... calling the wrong number?

But I know I've talked to you when I dialed that number!

Wait a minute.

I got it!

THERE'S A TORIBOT LOOSE IN BERGEN COUNTY!!

[sweh.livejournal.com]

Aren't the XXX phone numbers for sex. So if you've been getting Tori then... oh... that's how they can afford a new house!

[auntiemisha.livejournal.com]

Um, jaywalking? Where did you get this ticket?

[syringavulgaris.livejournal.com]

Between my house and the train station.

[dkfromtk.livejournal.com]

$54 for jaywalking?!?

I don't even know what jaywalking is, but I'm fairly sure it's not worth $54.

[syringavulgaris.livejournal.com]

"Not crossing at a crosswalk". Or, doing it in the right place but against the light.

In NYC, it's a way of life, which is why the fine is a whole $3. If they even bother to stop you, which I have never seen nor heard of.

[dkfromtk.livejournal.com]

...

The fuck?

I cross the *highway* on foot all the time. Almost got mowed down by a cop once.

And I take naps in the middle of rotaries.

Jaywalking is NOTHING.

[syringavulgaris.livejournal.com]

Hence, my ire.

[ronebofh.livejournal.com]

Fuck that. I would have contested the whole thing at that point. "You said no court date, you fine me for not appearing at my court date, you can go to hell."

[syringavulgaris.livejournal.com]

I would do so (since the failure to appear notice does include a {new} date), except that said date is only a couple days after Early Morning Of A Million Zillion Movers. I don't need the aggro of dropping everything to go argue with bureaucratic tards.

[ronebofh.livejournal.com]

What the hell would they do, anyway? Issue a warrant for your arrest?

[syringavulgaris.livejournal.com]

In fact, that's exactly what the "failure to appear" notice says.

[ronebofh.livejournal.com]

That would be a laugh and a half... *sigh* i wonder if it would be worth it to let them try to arrest you for jaywalking. Just to see what the judge would say.

[syringavulgaris.livejournal.com]

My appetite for chaos is cheering me on to that choice, but the thing is, I just *know* the arrest would happen at Worst Possible Moment.

[syringavulgaris.livejournal.com]

Oh, they also list yanking my driver's license as an option, I forgot to note.

FYI

[yesthattom.livejournal.com]

Such letters, as well as anything written on the check, is considered a statement made in court in front of the judge.

I once saw a person brought in for contempt because he had written, "Fuck you!" on the memo field of his check. The judge treated it the same way as if he had sent it in court. The new fine was much, much, much bigger.

(Not that you said "fuck you" in your letter.)