serinde

This one is from a user whose name is a) recognizable by, and b) causes howls of derision in, anyone who reads p.q. (It was the perfect ending to a day made hideous by a major SAN failure that took out half the hosts in our network--basically, everything that didn't get hit last time.)

Mr. Spoonfeed-Me: I'm trying to use the mail thing where you come into the net.
Your humble correspondent: ...Do you perhaps mean the webmail system?
MSM: Yeah, that. Wait I thought it was called Squirrelmail.
YHC: That's the software we're using, yes.
MSM: Well is it Squirrels or is it webmail?
YHC: "webmail" is a generic term for a setup that permits you to read your email from a web browser. Squirrelmail is the specific application we use here.
MSM: See, now, you should explain that to your customers. We don't know all that so it's confusing to us and you should make it clear.
YHC: . o O ( I suppose you want us to explain the difference between "Panasonic" and "television", too. ...Well, actually, you probably would. )
YHC: I will pass on your comments and we will take them under consideration. Meantime, what can I help you with?
MSM: I'm having problems getting in.
YHC: (assuming an authentication problem) OK, what are you typing in on the login page? In fact, what specific page are you on?
MSM: Well I type in my username and my password and I had all kinds of problem with that--
YHC: Wait wait, but what *specifically* are you typing?
MSM: --and I had to get someone there to explain that to me, and it's so confusing, you really need to make this easier--
YHC: But WHAT are you TYPING in the BLANKS?
MSM: [correct answers]
YHC: (Huh.) And it gives you an error?
MSM: No, not now. I get in now that I know to put in @domain.com. Why doesn't it SAY that? I'm sure it's obvious to YOU but it's not to the rest of us!
YHC: Well, it does say "Email address", not "username".
MSM: No it doesn't.
YHC: I beg your pardon, it does indeed.
MSM: ...Oh. Well, I'm getting old. [1]
YHC: So you're logging in successfully, then; good. What do you see then?
MSM: Well then I just gave up because it gave me this whole page telling me I hadn't logged in before. Clearly there was something wrong because I've been a user for years and the system should know who I am.
YHC: Had you logged into webmail before?
MSM: No. *silence as penny audibly drops*
YHC: So, you can fill out the information there, which is where it gets the information if you are sending mail from webmail. Or you can just click through it and do it later from the Options.
MSM: Well, you should make that clear! It's confusing to your users! I know that everyone there is super-bright but your users aren't all that smart--
YHC: . o O ( Well, some of them aren't, that's very clear. )

Ensued then a long lecture about how this is needs to have lots of extra words and explanations, and no doubt popup windows and blink tags, explaining everything on the page that one might see. Including what to answer such perilous queries as "Your Name" and "Your Email Address" with, we are to understand.

Bonus points to any faggot hackers who can spot the user. Except

elibalin and

dariodevil, obviously; and

sweh and

jdev, who heard this rant via IM.

[1] Upon later relaying this to Office Mom, who is of a similar age, she completely blew her stack and took offense on behalf of her generation.